The Rules
1) Gautama's
Law
The
suffering of sickness, old age, death and rebirth are unavoidable, all
other suffering is optional.
2)
The Rule of Opposites
There
are two kinds of people in the world. Those that think there are two kinds
of people, and those that don't.
3) Metaphysical
Truth
A
Metaphysical Truth is something upon which you and I happen to agree with
which someone who is bigger or smarter than us does not happen to disagree.
4)
Gamble's Rule
When your work speaks for itself, shut up
5)
Starr's Law
Worry
is interest you pay on money you didn't borrow.
6) Epitaph
for A Troubadour [Gamble Rogers]
The
Good Lord gave him grace, and the Devil gave him style
7) Rule
of Demand
A luxury once enjoyed becomes a necessity
8)
A. Einstein's 2nd Rule of Relativity
Try not to be a man of success, but rather a man of value.
9)
Rule of Worms
Once you open a can of worms, it is impossible to get them all back into
the same sized can
10) Lillian's
Legacy
There
are beings in this world whose sole function in your life is to allow
you to acquire good karma, practice patience and build character. And
sometimes they are all too easy to find.
11) The
Rule of Expectations (Mark Twain)
Expecting
life to treat you "fairly" because you're a good person is like expecting
the bull NOT to charge you because you're a vegetarian.
12) The
Second Rule of Expectations
An EXPECTATION is a Premeditated resentment.
Contributed
by Julia
13) Proof
In Advertising
Assholes Always Advertise.
14) Rule
of Just Compensation
Nobody
can be paid enough for a job that politeness can be left out or ignored.
The price paid by the employer or the employee (or both) is the loss of
humanity.
15)
The Pursuit of Happiness
Happiness
is NOT a right, but the result of karma (AKA:physics), effort, personal
opinion and often, a distorted view of the distant or not so distant past.
16) Rule
of Cheap Lessons
The
only lessons really worth learning are those that are the most expensive.
17) Kat's
Rule of Perspective
Perspective
is TOTALLY USELESS when you are in the midst of turmoil.
18)
Frog's Footnote on Skillfulness
The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates
how difficult it was.
19) Will
Rogers' Rule on Civilization
No
society can consider itself civilized unless it respects the rights of
others
20)
Rule of Politeness
Impoliteness,
like confrontation, is sometimes an act of violence, they are always acts
of aggression.
21) "The
Platinum Rule"
Do
unto yourself also as you would have others do unto you.
22)
Sandburg's Solution (Carl Sandburg)
Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only
you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other
people spend it for you.
23)
Kat's Encouragement
Flap
with what you've got...
24)
The Rule regarding Growing Old
Don't fret old age, it is a privilege denied many...
25)
Matthew's Reminder
Whatever you do in life, it is guaranteed that you will provoke about
30% of the people. It is important that you remain a part of the other
70%.
26) Judy's
Rule
Forget the experience, remember the lesson.
27)
Rule of Illusionary Value
Most people will sacrifice more and fight harder to protect a valuable
illusion than they will to defend an unglamorous truth.
28)
Rule of Fields (William Claude Dirkenfield - American Philosopher)
You
can fool some of the people most of the time, and that's enough to make
a decent living
29) Rule
of Accounting
Not
everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be
counted counts.
30)
Rule of Wrong Lessons
If
the student, friend or companion is not permitted or encouraged to question;
not permitted or encouraged to a dialog; the principle lesson learned
is indifference.
31)
The Rule of Perception
Things are not as they seem, nor are they otherwise...Lankavatara
Sutra - Shakyamuni Buddha
32)
The Point of Humor
Humor
is the absence of terror, and terror is the absence of humor.
Lord
Buckley - Artist and RastaMan
33) Law
of Lottery Logic
People
who will swear that they will never, ever in their entire life be struck
by lightning are usually quite happy to buy a lottery ticket.
34)
The Law Regarding the Worth of Jewels
The price of character is often steep. The wise always try to use what
they have purchased.
35)
Harrison's Axiom
Feelings are not facts.
36) Rule
concerning Depth of the Dharma
"The Dharma
is bigger and deeper than any of us idiots who say we follow it."
37) Lillis'
Corollary to Harrison's Axiom
The facts that result from feelings are often worth more than the facts
without feelings.
38) Rule
of Napoleonic Generals
Never
confuse wisdom with luck.
39) Law
of Laughing Sages
Life
is MUCH too important to be taken seriously!
40)
Gift of Flower's Power
There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children.
One of these is roots; the other, wings.
Contributed
by J.M.M. Age 3
41) Definition
: LUDIOCRACY
When
the idiots are running the bureaucracy/asylum.
Contributed
by Rose Nersesian, based on life experiences
42) The
Rule of Groucho
Never pass up a straight line, 'cause you never know when you're liable
to need one.
43) Upton's
Axiom on Engineering
There comes a time in the life of every project when it is necessary to
shoot the engineers and go into production.
44)
Harry Callahan's Rule
A
man has got to know his own limitations.
45) Rule
Regarding Mind Reading
If men and women were really capable of reading each others' minds, most
would be either too embarrassed or too angry to ever face each other again
46) Harold
E. Kohn's Rule
Brooks
become crooked by following the path of least resistance. So do
people.
47)
Rule of Statistical Revelation
Statistics are like bikinis. What they reveal is suggestive, but what
they conceal is vital. - Aaron Levenstein
48) Galbraith's
Rule of Choices
Faced
with a choice between changing one's mind and proving that there is no
need to do so, almost everybody gets busy on the proof. - John Kenneth
Galbraith
49) Lincoln's Criteria
Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's
character, give him power. - Abraham Lincoln
50)
The Rule of Technology
The technology is easy, it's the politics that's hard.
51) Seneca's
Note
Men do not care how nobly they live, but only how long, although
it is within the reach of every man to live nobly, but within no man's
power to live long. - Seneca (5BC - 65AD)
52) Wordge's
Rule
Birds
that flock together grow the same feathers.
53)
54)
e. e. cumming's Rule of Conquest
To
be nobody-but-yourself - in a world which is doing its best night and
day to make you everybody else - means to fight the hardest battle any
human being can fight; and never stop fighting.-- e.e. cummings
55) The Rule
Regarding Small Minds
When you find yourself the victim of other people's bitterness, ignorance,
smallness or insecurities, remember, things could be worse - you could
be them.
56)
57)
The Rule of Heinz
Never
eat the "Trout Almondenne" at a place named "Joe's".
58)
59)
60)
61) Rule
of Veracity
People
will believe a lie if they want it to be true or if they are afraid that
it is true.
62) Rule
of Intent
The
very best of intentions very often lead to the very worst of results.
63) Rule
of Dominance
Passion
rules Reason
64)
65)
66) The
Route 66 Rule - Topology Proliferates
There
is more than one way to get to Chicago, there are even more ways not to
get to Chicago.
67)
68)
69) Lennon's
Law
Life
is what happens while you are busy making other plans.
70) The
Four Fears
There are four types of fear. In descending order, they are:
1. The fear of losing what you have.
2. The fear of acquiring what you don't want.
3. The fear of not getting what you want.
4. The fear of not losing what you don't want.
71)
Karpman's Rule - The Drama Triangle
In
any drama there are three and only three roles: Victim , Persecutor and
Rescuer . Roles can shift in a matter of moments, and any actor can take
on any role. (Stephen B. Karpman 1968)
72)
73)
74)
75)
76)
77)
78) The
Machinists Rule
If
you have the best machinist in the world, given a complex task and a brand
new lathe, he will spend at least a day testing and setting up the lathe
before he begins the actual work. The 10,000th best machinist in the world
will perform the same tasks, i.e. learning about the tools and how well
they function before attempting the job, but it might take him (or her)
4 or 5 days to install and test the lathe. Give the same set of tools
and tasks to someone who knows NOTHING about machining and the first thing
they will do is pick up a piece of metal and try to fashion a finished
part.
79)
The Crazy Question Day Rule
Given
the situation above (Rule 78) the NEXT thing the non-machinist will do
is call "Customer Support" and complain that the lathe is defective.
80) The
Rule about Moving Gibraltar
In the face of an obstacle which is impossible to overcome,
stubbornness is stupidity - Simone de Beauvior
81) The Rule of Actions
An action presupposes a motivation, a motivation presupposes a goal. There are no random or unintended behaviors, but there are many unacknowledged and/or unadmitted goals - Fred Kennedy
82) An Observation About Crabs
After you put more than a few crabs in the basket, you don't need a lid on it. The ones at the bottom pull the ones on their up and out back down to the bottom as they try to climb up and out over them. Endlessly. Unfortulately people tend to do the same thing. - Shih Shenlung
83)
84)
85)
86)
87)
The Rule Regarding the Choice of a Worthy Opponent
The problem with getting into a mudslinging match with a pig is that although
you both get covered with mud, the pig will enjoy it.
88)
The Rule On Perpetuation of Ignorance
"There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which
is a proof against all argument, and which cannot fail to keep a man in
everlasting ignorance-that principle is condemnation before investigation." (Herbert
Spencer)
89)
90) Forbes'
Rule
"It is much easier to suggest solutions when you don't know too much
about the problem."
- Malcolm Forbes (1919-1990)
91) Rule Regarding Insight
"Knowing
others is Power, knowing self is Wisdom. Power without wisdom rarely
if ever leads to beneficial results." -
Shih Shenlung (Cha'n/Zen Buddhist Monk 1947-????)
92) Hanlon's Razor
Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.
93)
94)
95)
96)
97) Rule of Relative Humor
"I
would laugh too if he wasn't mine"(Wife when she saw her husband drunk
on the street in the middle of the day.)
98)
99) The
Real-Value Triangle
Good - Fast - Cheap::: Pick TWO!
100)
The Rule of Probable Value
If you
are very, very careful, and very, very lucky sometimes you will actually
get what you paid for.
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